As you may know, I like Jesus. I like church, I like Jesus, I like being a Lutheran.
Sunday, I went to church like a good Lutheran and even helped distribute communion. Pastor Williams was doing some laying on of hands and what not, so Karen was distributing bread, Jean was standing next to me with the common cup, I had the tray of little-cups and Phyllis had the basket for little-cup-collection.
I was handing out the blood of Christ (which has been shed for you, amen) as one does when distributing communion when all of the sudden there was a nudge and a "Hey!" coming from Jean on my right side. Jean had a panicked look on her face; a look of absolute horror. She motioned at the common cup with wide eyes and a look that said to me, "What the hell do I do???"
I looked in the common cup and there swimming around in the blood of Christ was a fly, its little wings flapping rapidly attempting to save himself from certain death (he, apparently, was not resigned to the fact that he was going to die for us as Jesus was).
I gave Jean my best, "I have no idea what the hell to do" look, and she moved on to Karen for help. The same scenario played out on Jean's right side, except that instead of another terrified look, Karen whispered, "Just get rid of it!"
I'm not sure what happened to that little fly, but Jean returned with an insect-free chalice. Phyllis asked me what was going on, and I told here of the little guy, and we both very unsuccessfully attempted to suppress giggles for a few minutes.
By the way, the healing what not took FOREVER and I very much regretting volunteering to hold the tray of little-cups. I should have volunteered for the chalice, because it is much lighter. Then, though, I would have had to deal with the fly.
*upward hand motion